Let me start by saying that in our family there is no such thing as “half”. There are no half brothers, half sisters, half of a cake, because… well… we ate it already.
If you’ve been following along you’ll know that “The Birthgiver” and I are great friends. Another reason that Kim and I understand each other so well is that we were pregnant together. Imagine being out in public and you and Baby Momma both have giant bellies. *Awkward!* In 2011, Terry received the best of both worlds. A brother and a sister, just three months apart.
“This is my brother.” “This is my sister.” “They’re not brother and sister.” That is how Terry introduces his siblings. Kid really knows how to confuse a person.
Being a blended family, in our case, doesn’t mean four parents and the child. It means four parents and three children. We are all one family and you’re there for your family. Always.
Terry and his brother, Houston both have spent a lot of time in the hospital. Terry has asthma and Houston has asthma and Eosinophilic Esophagitis. (keep trying to say that and I’ll have a post about it later.) A huge part of our EOE support system are Kim and her husband, Justin. They’re there for fundraising events. They buy awareness bracelets and tshirts. They drive miles from home to pick up Terry at the hospital ER where he’s been waiting for hours by his brothers’ side. They do all that because they love Terry. They do all that because they love his brother and our love for Prudence is just as much. I have to squeeze her in my arms every time I see her.
The happiest I have ever seen Terry are the times he’s with his brother and sister. Together. It is important for us to keep them close. They will be all each other have one day. Three is way better than two.
If your stepchild has “half” siblings and they have no idea who each other even are, it may be time to change that. Again, set your feelings aside and do what you can for your family. Like it or not, you’re all a family, all connected through one little person. Or a couple little people. Plan a birthday party for your biochild and invite the others. Sit together at school and sporting events. Have a family dinner night. If you live close enough and could handle it, heck, blend your Christmas! Ooooo these are good ideas…Kim!!! Can we have family dinner night!?!? 🙂 I know what you’re thinking now, “look, she is giving us this crap and she doesn’t even do those things!” EEEHHH WRONG! We do birthday parties together. We save bleachers for one another at the baseball field. Guess who even goes to events at Terrys’ school? Houston and me, that’s who! A blended Christmas would be awesome if we didn’t live an hour apart! Santa would be a little late.
Seeing the three of them laughing together and playing together. When we pick up or drop Terry off and Prudence darts out the back door to see us or Houston is trying his best to jump out of the car, there is a strong sense of completion. Your unit is complete. You now know that the three of them will always have each other. Regardless of where life takes them, Terry can call up his brother and sister and they will BOTH come running. Probably in the same car.
Well… that’s if Terry hasn’t knocked them both out a few times by then. 😉 They’re the littles, what do you expect from Big Brother?