Category Archives: Momster Movies

Movie Momsters

*All thoughts and opinions are strictly my own.*

As I’ve said before, I’m addicted to movies.  It’s a real problem.  I have been known to have full conversations speaking only in movie quotes.  Up until recently, I haven’t given much thought to how stepmothers are portrayed in films.

Parent_trap_(1961)

theatrical poster by Reynold Brown

Watching movies growing up, all I could think was “Man, I’m glad I don’t have one of those!”  I’d hate to have to make her run away screaming like the “almost” stepmother, Vicky Robinson in The Parent Trap (1961).  Boy, that Vicky sure could make you wanna pop her in her freshly made up kisser!  “Oh yes! Don’t say anything about that dear, sweet, precious Vicky! That plus-faced child bride and her electric hips!” See I told you, movie quotes.  That Maggie tickles me.  At the end of it all, Mom and Dad get back together and they all live happily ever after.  However, if Vicky had thought less about herself and more about Susan and Sharon she could have held onto Mitch a little longer.  On a side note, how amazing is Hayley Mills?  Am I right?  “Mindy, it’s a movie.”  I know.  I know.  So many films can latch onto your heart.  Make you feel something.  That’s what it’s supposed to do.

After becoming a stepparent and watching all of these films with characters we love to hate, I couldnt help but wonder where had all the good women gone.  Is there not a woman who could come barreling in after the death of a mother and NOT try to torture that poor womans’ child(ren)?  Did everyone in Hollywood have a horrible childhood with an evil woman.  Well ya don’t have to take it out on the rest of us!  Making kids think their stepmoms will try to poison them or lock them in an attic or ship them off to boarding school.  Boarding school?  Is that a convincing threat?  I’ll keep that one in my back pocket.  😉

Don’t get me wrong.  I know that some of you might have gotten a bad seed from a rotten apple.  Let’s all be fair here, there are some bio moms that like to stir the pot.  Yeah, I know you’re thinking about her right now.  You wanna pop her in the kisser too, I get it. I really do.  Shes rude, disrespectful, and vindictive.  SM’s (stepmoms for future reference) she’s not trying to hurt you.  She’s trying to hurt him.  She wants him to be so worked up and cursing her under his breath.  She likes it.  She enjoys seeing him angry. Hurt.  She’ll manipulate his children.  They might love you but she wants them to grow to hate him.  You know a woman like that?  She sounds Evil, doesn’t she?  Maybe that’s what we should be seeing!  That’s an Oscar winner right there!  I’m going to write that…right now.  I’ll make sure Leonardo Dicaprio is cast as “Dad.”  I mean, someone give that dang man an Oscar!

SM, don’t feel like I’m here to single you out and tell you that the key to happiness is all on you.  Sometimes, Baby Momma is just an ugly witch with a giant mole on her face.  Be hopeful that she gets her happy ending because THAT my friend is when they can hit you with the plot twist.

leo-dicaprio-oscar-soon